Officials want public comment on marriage & divorce

| 25/02/2011

(CNS): As part of government’s reform of family law, the Law Reform Commission is circulating a consultation and discussion paper identifying issues to be considered in the proposed reform ofthe Matrimonial Causes Law. Officials said the paper sets out questions for consideration by the public but the commission has made no final recommendations on any matter. It is currently inviting the public to comment and make suggestions regarding matrimonial issues, including those relating to damages for adultery; compulsory mediation or counselling in divorce proceedings and whether the law should be reformed to provide for irretrievable breakdown to be the single lawful reason for divorce.

One of the main differences between Cayman’s marital law and other jurisdictions is that people must still prove a fault based reason for divorce, such as adultery, unreasonable behaviour or desertion. They must also wait two years, even when a marriage has clearly broken down, contrasting with other jurisdictions where couples are granted divorces after twelve months apart and no faults necessarily being cited.

Lengthy time separations are believed by experts to merely prolong divorce rather than prevent it and having a no fault single reason for divorce may prevent acrimony.

Cayman has a very high divorce rate, according to the commission, and there is a strong belief in the community that where marriages have not irretrievably broken down there should be more access to mediation, especially in times of temporary difficulties. The discussion paper reveals that mediation before the lawyers are involved is common in the region and has proved successful. The commission asks if the country’s high divorce rate could be cut if couples were offered the opportunity of counselling.

The commission also raises the question of whether Cayman should retain the section of the law that provides third parties in cases of adultery to pay damages, as such a provision has been considered anachronistic in some jurisdictions and abolished. It is argued that it promotes bitterness in the termination of marriages.

The discussion paper can be accessed here. 

Comments should be submitted in writing by 31st March, 2011 to the Director of the Law Reform Commission, 3rd Floor Anderson Square c/o Government Administration Building or sent by e-mail to Cheryl.Neblett@gov.ky.

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  1. Korea says:

     DIRTY MEN LIVING IN CAYMAN – NEED TO STAY OUT OF MARRIAGE  

    All about marriage eh?   Here’s another story. Besides Don’t trust x-pats to marry included in them are the Cayman Brackers who lived in Jamaica and had Jamaican Children! This is a Hot one!

    I knew a guy who was engaged to a very nice Caymanian lady. She treated him and his children better than he did. She also had children of her own. All he did was drink and smoke but she was planning at the first opportunity to get out of the relationship, she could not stand the drinking and embarrassment when he got drunk. The lady was a very helpful and loving person, never cheated on him but he was always cheating with other Jamaican women!  That’s what they always do.They want their own Jamaican women not Caymanians they only use them. Because the lady is a good person she was sorry for him and used her influence to help him get a good job with one of the large Utility companies in Cayman and instead of him trying to straighten up and return a favor, try to reciprocate and help out the lady when she needed him He turned his back on her and who is enjoying his big pay monthly now? the Jamaican hustler, higgler/housekeeper who had nothing to bring to the table but her F**nt. Now if anything happens to him the Jamaican who had nothing, came here with nothing gets everything and the lady who put him on his feet he don’t even send a post card of thanks or gratitude nor an apology for the dirt he dished her. As a matter of fact he made the landlady evict the woman he was living with upstairs and brought in his new Jamaican lady to live with him downstairs.  Oh this man was dirtier than Dirt itself. But TIME IS LONGER THAN ROPE, I told her not to worry she will live to see the day this man suffer for the wrongs he did to her a good woman, very hard to find her kind, they don’t make them anymore like her.

    • Reason. says:

      To Korea
      Well my dear, some woman have only them selves to blame, should have kicked him out, she let him do it, so she expext? Also Woman need to note the following.
      If you do not take any pride in your appearence and wear shoddy scruffy shaples clothes,and, if you stuff your face with fried chicken every day so your ASS becomes so large its like the back of a tour bus, or you sit at home wachin TV cuz you dont wanna do nowt els, then your man is gonna find someone else, oh yer and if you refuse us SEX we WILL get it else where. Woman put up with way to much, a man would never put up with it, your butt would been long gone..

      • noname says:

        Reason,

        Your spelling is long gone.  It so happen this lady was beautiful not out of shape at all.Women think that all Men are just dogs and are not even faithful to themselves much less a lady.

         

  2. Article says:

     
    FOR A LONG TIME I wondered if my husband was being unfaithful, butit has become unbearable since he is telling lies and his movements are cagey. He is going out every night and saying that he is going to look up friends, yet he is being seen with a female companion. But I am on to him. The question is, why do women out there keep getting involved with married men? Don’t you have any sense at all? Married men tell all sorts of lies, yet you women don’t seem to learn that the man is not leaving his family for a ready-made one. My reason for speaking out here, though, is not to condemn women who go out with married men. Rather, it is to deal with the woman who is involved with my husband. I want to thank you, for buying my husband’s clothes and cooking for him. At least he has some respect because I must say he’s really good at trying to hide what you’ve been doing. I also want to thank you for taking him to and from work and allowing him to sport around in your jeep with his buddies as I was reliably informed. I want to thank you especially for giving him the sex that you think is the ticket for him to leave me. You must know that for all this time he has been fooling you, yet you get joy in taking care of him – I just love it. My husband is cheating, yes, but do you think that I am going to leave him? No way, sister! I am well provided for and he is there at my beck and call. As he is approaching midlife, I know that certain health problems will arise and I will be there for him. Men do not realise that as a woman goes through menopause, they also go on pause – which is worse because of erectile dysfunction, diabetes, the whole shebang. So enjoy him because I know at the moment he is disease-free, and if I’m up to it, he has to use not one but two condoms. When you see me and try to dress like me, and brag to your friends that my husband sleeps with you and only poses with me, you better realise that you will end up the loser. I can say this because I, too, was in your shoes. A few years ago, I was involved with a married man and, guess what? That man is still with the wife that he told me he could not stand. Get my point? I have asked God for forgiveness for that indiscretion, so I’m free from that burden. But I learnt my lesson. In time you will, too, and I hope you can walk away like I did. Only then will you be convinced that you were nothing but a substitute. So, my dear friend, you save me a lot of time and energy. I’m not going anywhere and I’m staying with my husband for better or worse, until death do us part. Call me silly, but I was not the author of “those who God has joined together let no man put asunder”.
    I rest my case.
  3. Anonymous says:

    This whole discussion makes me laugh.  Marital fidelity is not determined by race or nationality.  It is what in your head and heart.

    And any "Christian" island where boyfriends and girlfriends who are shacking up for the sex can attend church and pretend to be righteous and receive the churches blessing because, hey, at least they are in church – deserve to burn in hellfire in this life and the next.

    Hypocrites.

  4. Just Commentin' says:

    In my opinion there should be a requirement for satisfactory completion of mandatory counseling and parenting classes, and a 24-month waiting period, prior to getting married.

    One reason for the high divorce rate is that far too many morons are rushing the relationship and rushing into marriage with other morons they are not compatible with. I think people should be made to wait until the "hots"  subside a bit and the thought process centres of the two love birds rise to above waist level.

    Having to prove "cause" to obtain a divorce is a gravy train for attorneys. It is also a great source of "official" news for our gossip mongers. I think this is why a requirement to prove cause has remained for so long. The airing of dirty laundry provides entertainment. It gives people something – other than the weather and politricks – to talk about as they stand around and socialise outside the church after Sunday morning service. Gushing congratulations as they shake hands with the pastor aside, the sermon will be forgotten even before Sunday dinner is fully digested, and the flock will scarcely share the preacher’s pithy wisdom with another soul. But that juicy news about who shagged who and when and how they got caught will be passed from ears to lips to ears for years.

    Contrary to implications contained in the article, one of our very close neighbouring jurisdictions, Florida, has a mere 20 day waiting period after filing before final judgement can be entered. There is no mandatory separation period required before a spouse can file a petition for dissolution. Florida is a "no-fault" divorce state – one of many states that has abolished proving fault as a requirement for obtaining a divorce.

    Only two causes for divorce exist in Florida: Irretrievable breakdown of the marriage; and, mental incapacity for at least 3 years. To qualify to file in Florida at least one of the parties must have lived in the state for the six month period prior to filing. If no minor children are involved and there is no contested property, applicants for divorce in Florida may opt for a Simplified Dissolution where the couple merely attests that the marriage is irretrievably broken and provides the required supporting documentation.

    By opting for a Simplified Dissolution, couples can "do-it-yourself" and avoid attorney fees! With a simplified dissolution, the divorce can be completed from start to finish in a matter of weeks and for just a few hundred dollars. That is the modern and sane way to do things. The divorce laws in the Cayman Islands belong where those horrid white wigs should be sent, back to the 19th century.

    No wonder our laws are so screwed up. What can one expect from a system in which certain honourable officials pay good money for hair styling and relaxer treatments and dye their hair to hide the gray, and then they don an ill-fitting curly white wig to work in? Dumb, eh?

    Cayman’s current requirement to prove cause and denigrate and demonise one’s partner and cause loss of faith and respect in the eyes of the community and in the eyes of a couple’s children is stupid and cruel. What if one party is simply sick and tired of their spouse’s foolishness? What if they just cannot stand being married to each other? No other reason. Neither has been a bad person. They are still on good terms and want to stay that way so they want to part ways before they get the urge to maim and kill. Under our stupid system they have to prove – at the least – "unreasonable behaviour". They might even have to lie and make up some type of "unreasonable behaviour" so they can part friends. Dumb, eh?

    What the hell is "unreasonable behaviour" anyway? Most women will agree that the husband leaving the toilet seat up so her bunkie hits the water when she sits on the w/c in the dark during the night certainly qualifies as unreasonable behaviour. But do the Cayman courts recognise a wet behind as grounds for divorce? A great number of  women will argue they should. The Law Reform Commission may have to investigate whether the inclusion of Improper Toilet Seat Positioning should be considered as grounds to dissolve a marriage. Any ladies here care to weigh in on this?

    They are asking whether the award for damages in the case of adultery should be preserved? No way this is serious! Is it? Here is what I say: Unless the ardent adulterers were a bit too rough when they tumbled, or they neglected to use sufficient personal lubricant, no damages should exist. OK?

    Oh well…Senseless laws and customs being a hallmark of the Cayman Islands, I have serious misgivings that Cayman divorce laws will be meaningfully modernised anytime soon – especially after the Law Reform Commission receives the requisite input from the CMA and other well-known Minions of Morality. But one can only hope.

  5. The Bachelor says:

    Women of Cayman.  Here is a tip if you want to get married and, more importantly, stay married. 

    Don’t be mental. 

    • Anonymous says:

      A few more suggestions: don’t be so materialistic, always wanting to keep up with the Joneses. Don’t go around beating up other women if your man cheats, that is just so low. And lastly, be a real woman, that can take care of a family and husband, without expecting your helper to do everything for you while all you do is get your nails done. Being a wife and mother does take a little work.

      • Anonymous says:

        18:39 it is women like you who is living in denial because you will know what your man is doing but is too stupid afraid and not educated eneough to be anything more than a house wife who has to share her husband with the made and enjoys it. Over the Hill.

      • Anon says:

        Well, nowadays the mistresses are going around beating up onthe wives. It doesn’t matter how good a wife and mother some women are, if a man’s going to cheat, he’s going to cheat but, he can’t do it alone so the woman that allows herself to get involved with a married man is just as disgraceful.

    • Anonymous says:

      12:55 FYI there is so much going on that would make your head spin. A year ago an elderly man had a helper from Honduras paying her 900.00 dollars a month, giving her free accomodation and free electricity and water bills. Also free food. He trusted her to the extent that he put her name to one of his accounts which had over 50,000. dollars to withdraw small amounts to go shopping for him. After sometime he became suspicious and took off her name. But she was still drawing out When he discovered she was drawing 500. every week until the account only had 4,000 left. She drew out 40 grand and split. Of course the bank had to refund half of the money, because he had taken off her name but they were not checking.
      News News News. there is talk around in a certain district that an elderly man 96 years of age signed his house and land papers over to his helper. The man is 97 years old, cannot read or write and is half gone in the head. The woman took him to a Jamaican Lawyer and told him that someone was buying his house and he signed the papers and dont even know what he signed much less has not seen the paper, cannot read the paper and she is now in Jamaica on Roll over soon come back to claim. Our Immigration and governemnt has no teeth they need to stop allowing these helpers to do this. Talk about robberies worse things are happening.

  6. Still Married says:

    I don’t see this as an immigration issue at all. Caymanians and expatriates alike are experiencing this break-down and quite often there are no Philipino, Jamaican or Honduran ‘mateys’ involved.

    Dating sites are rampant, Facebook allows intimacy that would normally take months or years to develop and there are pills for everything. You tell people how you feel in 140 characters on Twitter! So who wants to take time to work at improving a relationship?

    Making pre-marital counselling mandatory (not just a 1-hr session) can assist with ending divorce.

    Is there a short form of this discussion paper just showing in point form what changes are being proposed?

  7. Anonymous says:

    But I love my expat bf soon to be husband…I just need to figure out whether all the other girls with a ring on their finger are his full-time gfs or just the ‘secretary’!

  8. Anonymouse. says:

    Having read all previous posts here on this subject, I am fully convinced that marrying a Caymanian woman is out of the question for me. Remarks such as the woman being entitled to everything if the man goes out on the marriage just shows me the kind of mentality that Caymanian women have.

    I know of so many incidences where the woman commits adultery, and yet in every case the man is always the loser. Is this the reason why so many men are turning to same sex relationships?.  I really hope not.

    I just came out of a 40 year realtionship with a Honduran woman. Death was the cause, not divorce, and if I had my life to live over again, I would not want it to be any different. Knowing what I do about the mentality of Caymanian women would only make me want more of the Honduran woman. To those Caymanian women who thinks Honduran women are all bar pick ups, you need to reexamine your thoughts on this because you are very mixed up and bitter about the wrong things.

    • Anonymous says:

      01;23 As a Caymanian would say. “Sorry for you” Because whatyou dont know wont kill you.

    • Anonymous says:

      Let’s not generalize. There are many cases where men think they don’t have to contribute to the marriage, they hang out playing dominos and are never involved with raising the children. Once the marriage is over the men don’t even come to visit much less financially support their children. Perhaps that’s one of the reason why some women think they should get everything as they know they will be on their own with the financial stress of raising a child and providing a proper education.

  9. Judge Dredd says:

    Cayman should not get sucked into the processes of larger countries for divorce.  The legal community in Cayman has no culture of mediation and a couple of days training on a mediation course and a pretty certificate is not enough to do the job.  The divorce lawyers in Cayman fight a particularly wild and bitter fight in a country which has moved towards unfortunately wild and bitter interactions in the name of dispute resolution in recent years.

    Read some of these posts.  Do you think mediation will help in the cases involving some of the more passionate posters on this thread?

    Streamline.  Modernise.  Increase regulation of the attorneys.  Case manage.  Take timetables and issues from the lawyers and into the hands of judges.  

  10. Anonymous says:

    Hey guys,

    Get saved, get a saved man that love god with all his heart and obeys his Pastor. don’t go out side of the church to look for a man, Look at his pastor and find out where his mind and heart is spiritually before comitting to marriage.

    Stop allowing these foreign men to lure you into a marriage. they DONOT WANT YOU!  You may have the ring but his own country woman will control and OWN HIM and his money!. It makes no sense.

    Government need to garnish their checks for child support and put them in their place.

     

  11. Carpet Muncher says:

    Hetro’s are the big problem here. People in same sex marriages are much happier and much less likely to part ways so easily. Unless we legalise it soon, we’ll make the jump from 5th to 1st on the UN’s divorce rate list.

  12. Anonymous says:

    One of the big dstructions to long term marriages today is that the male spouse becomes addicted to online romances.  They are taken in by the beautiful women on Match.com, tagged.com and other Dating Romance networks.  Most of those women are porn stars, models used by the scammers, who usually originates from Ghana, Nigeria and the Phillipines.  The stupid man that has been in a marriage for many years, falls pry to these scammers and send them money from their family savings and destroys their marriages  and family unit, through their online lust.  Lust is a big Bibical sin and is a BIG part of adultry.  Marriages in Cayman should be dissolved, after a man commits adultry and refuses to get help for his online adulterous addiction.  They do not believe that they are addicted and sometimes blames their wives for their hidden problems.  In this case the woman should be entitled to receive everything that the marriage created.  The cheating men on this island can easily go to Immigration and take out Work Permits for these women they meet online, in the hope that they will come here to marry them.  Our Immigration needs to investigate these people first before issuing the work permits.  Most times these women are not real immigration, so please do not issue any work permits until you get their fingerprints.  They can easily produce false police records, so stop issuing these work permits to these Cayman men.  They usually say they are bringing them in to work for them, but thats a BIG lie.  They are bringing these women in to have sex with them and to marry them.. Immigration is supporting a BIG pornography ring that is going on with our Cayman men.

    • C Sheen says:

      I am not addicted.  It is my wife’s fault.  But thanks for the work permit idea – brilliant.

    • Ron Jeremy says:

      ‘Immigration is supporting a BIG pornography ring that is going on with our Cayman men.’

      Does anyone know where this happens? Is there a web site or can we get tickets on the street?

  13. Fashionista says:

    I do hope they make some progress towards recognising same sex unions.

    • Anonymous says:

      If they do, they may be surprised at how little seperation/divorce occurs in such unions.

  14. Anonymous says:

    What you want to do is force the fathers of children to pay child support. If they had to pay for the children they help to create perhaps they would think twice about sport sex.

  15. Anonymous says:

     Guess what guys marriage should be about love not about how long you know someone or where they are from.  I met my husband on March 6th and and 4 months latter on July 10th we got married.  I am caymanian and he is honduran, We are very happy now going for twelve years and we are faithfull to each other and no we don’t fight.  Marriage is all about working together to make each other happy, and no we don’t have separate bank accounts.  We seek advice from our pastor even though we are not christians we never speak of divorce.  No marriage will ever work without love, trust, respect and honesty and lets not forget god because with him all things are possible.

     

    • Anonymous says:

      16:22 I am happy for you, but you are not yet out of the woods.  So dont let your guard down,  I have known one Caymanian who was married to a hondurian man or 30 years he went out and found hotter salsa dip and bought chips for two years, now he is in a wheel chair drinking milk.

    • Anonymous says:

      As long as we have only men running this country nothing will be done. We need women in the house. Deli Cat food will always be onsupermarket shelves, because if you check it out all the big wigs in private and government is eating it. I just hope they know exactly what we are talking about. The Government want information?, well they are getting information.

  16. Owl says:

    HOW CAYMAN MEN THINK!   (They are Seamen!)

    Hey Guys!

    Here’s how the Cayman man think. they were all seamen. so were their fathers. When they went to sea and the ship was on dry dock or they got a break they went ashore and there were Women of the evening waiting for them!

    Those women of the evening came from jurisdictions that our Government is PRINTING WORK PERMITS FOR  24/7’s to come here and BREAK UP FAMILIES!  They are the same women they played with when at sea. They meet them in the bars, and when they come home and the sea life is behind them or so we all are duped to think, the SEAMAN IS STILL IN HIM! He’s still visiting the bars looking for those same XXXX women to play with.

    So the voting women of Cayman need to stand up band themselves together and put pressure on the legislators to STOP BRINGING THESE WOMEN TO OUR SHORES granting them nanny jobs and helper jobs and BAR WAITRESS JOBS< yea that’s the family killer there, there’s where they can get their  dose of medicine in their food, beer and wine and hard liquor to fix them up real good and dope them up real good that he will be eating out of her hand XXXXXX

    So START THE MARRIAGE REFORM BY SHUTTING DOWN THE BARS

    SCRAP AND DEMOLISH THE LIQUOR LICENSING BOARD THAT IS DESTROYING FAMILY LIFE CREATING WHORE HOUSES IN CAYMAN.Last but not least. import elderly women to fill those positions as nannys and helpers. You idiots are putting a young thing, a brick house in your home to be your helper and instead of her performing domestic duties she is performing the duties of a wife to the husband when he sneaks back home during the day while his lawful wife is at work!  Yes this is what is happening. How many maids have taken away the husband, So stop the nonsense and WOMEN OF CAYMAN TAKE CHARGE AND TELL THE LEGISLATORS WHAT YOU WANT DONE, NOT WHAT THEY WANT DONE, ’cause some of them have done the same thing!  Hello!.

    DO YOU HAVE A REASON NOW TO START ELECTING SOME STRONG WOMEN IN OUR LEGISLATURE? As long as you keep those ‘XXXX HEADS" there you will have this problem. Replace some of them and get some fighting women in that house.  Buying yams for farmers is good but we need some tiger fighting women in the L.A in 2013.

    • Anonymous says:

      You are right Owl, there is a reason why you see good at night. Many of these Caymanian and expat women too need to watch their home front because you are being helped. Now if you dont mind, thats a different thing, but you are being helped, any way you take it. Cant find him at night. Go out and buy cat food..

    • Hallowe'en Jack says:

      Posts like this make me question the value of the universal franchise.

      Maybe there should be an intelligence test before you get to vote.

    • Anonymous says:

      Did you really just write that any woman that comes to Cayman and works as a waitress is here to steal our husbands? Really they are all that that great?

      Not likely.

      Believe it or not she makes more money just by being nice and providing food and beer. She doesn’t have to take any of them home.

      Get a grip!

    • Anonymous says:

      Hey, go check the bar before the lights on XXXXX. Big fat guy pimp with glasses sits behind these girls sitting at the bar with another pimp ‘security guy’ sitting at the other end of the bar. They have curtained cubicles just behind in public view..so you can ‘get to know’ the female. What is the title on the work permit? This is officially now in public and allowed and lawful? Why is this been ignored – someone been paid for this to go on? Is this human trafficking?

    • noname says:

      Marriage reform? We suggest you start by making yourself appear a little more intelligent and attractive to your husband. Of course it is ALWAYS easier to blame some other…

      • Anonymous says:

        07:47 Caymanian women were not used to eating their food under table. So if we have to bend so low to keep our men and husbands I prefer to say let them go. Because it cost much more to eat under the table than on top of it, so let those who can afford to pay for it go right ahead. Hot dogs are bade from all sorts of thing, so I would rather sit comfortable at the table with my family. Only dogs and cats are fed under table, remember that.

    • Anonymous says:

      Don't classify all Caymanian men (or any men or women) as the same because of your experiences. I have been happily married for nearly 30 years to a man that I know is faithful and who knows I am faithful to him. The same goes for his siblings and parents, all of whom have been married longer than us. It happens that my husband and his family are Caymanian and I am originally from somewhere else, not that it matters. What matters is that you enter into a marriage intending it to be exclusive and to last. At times you may have to work harder than you ever imagined but it is worth it if you are BOTH committed. 

  17. Don't worry I wont stay says:

     People should be married by lawyers and divorced by priests.

     

     

  18. Anonymous says:

    Sadly, for many young women, the marriage is the hangover after the wedding party.

    Young people need realistic counselling before marriage.

  19. Anonymous says:

     I think that mediation and counselling should be the first resort unless there is abuse. These men who are having midlife crisis want to leave their wives and children for the first bartender they set eyes on should definitely have some marriage counselling and realize the damage that they are inflicting on their children and for what? Marriage is a commitment and if they can’t commit until death do you part then don’t get married.  

    Actually, everyone who is getting married should have premarital counselling.  Maybe, it would weed out those marriages of convenience.

    • Combat says:

      Add venereal diseases and aids/HIV to the list that this is a requirement to be married whether x-pat or Caymanian.

      • Anonymous says:

        Combat dont leave out Hipatitis that is anotheer test should be done. That Immigration form need to be dashed away and a new one done. And private doctorsneed to do the right thing, stop making these dirty medicals slip through the seams of your office. Dont be surprised someone knows.

      • nope says:

         are you suggesting that people who are HIV positive shouldn’t have the right to be married???????

    • Anonymous says:

      They don’t care so why would they go to counselling – remember…there is nothing wrong with them!

  20. Owl says:

    Subway Cookie,

    You are Right On!

    Why prolong a divorce when the woman is being beaten to death! that is reason to get out ASAP with NO DELAY!

    Don’t keep women in homes where their lives are threatened,nor incest, nor adultry.  If for any reason they want a divorce GIVE IT TO THEM, AND MOVE ON!   THE COURTS CAN NOT BE GOD!  Not even God is trying to make them do what their will does not comply with! So who are our legislators?Some marriages happened in undo inflfuence!  Obeah, witchcraft, and voodoo and santaria. not the real thing. It wears off after a while and the man want to GETWAY! from Jezebel when he wakes up!

    Most lawmakers cheat, and are NOT QUALIFIED TO PASS SUCH LAWS.If anything,Counsel them and whatever they both decide grant their wish to go their separate ways or to stay. Its up to them not the courts or the lawmakers are you crazy!

    Here’s a SHOCKER for McKeeva and the L.A. and The Courts office.

    Do us all a favor and when an x-pat marries a local, CHECK THEIR COUNTRY OF ORIGIN TO SEE IF THEY HAVE BEEN MARRIED BEFORE. I DO BELIEVE THERE ARE MORE CASES OF BIGAMY IN OUR MIDST THAN WE ARE AWARE OF! People are fighting for this territory, they’ll do anything to live here. This need to be investigated through a world check system to see if they have committed bigamy.

    • Anonymous says:

      You are not required to stay living with them for that 2 years…. The point is to be separated.

  21. poly says:

    Deceit is the pivotal point.

    Adultery: voluntary sexual intercourse between a married person and someone other than his or her lawful spouse.

    This can consensual among the married couple, as is the case with “Open” or “Polyamorous” relationships, and should not be illegal.

    Deceit is one thing. Adultery is not necessarily deceit. Declaring adultery illegal without specific reference to deceit would be short sided and outdated before it is passed as the definition of marriage is evolving, evenin the heterosexual world.

    • Kung Fu Iguana says:

      We know what parties you go to!

      • poly says:

        That can be taken as a joke, all well and good.  But, Poly is not Swinging.  Far from it, in fact.   

        The honestly found within the a Poly community is a level of self and mutual respect others could benefit from.  

        Google a bit on it, you may be pleasantly surprised.  

  22. UDP Supporter says:

    I believe that divorce should not be allowed in a Christian country – as Cayman claims to be. Marriage should also only be between a man and a woman. And, if someone commits adultery, they should be fined or put in prison for the act. We need to keep this country from becoming like the United States and Europe where anyone can marry anyone and people can get divorced anytime they want. That is un-Godly and un-Christian.

    • Anonymous says:

      Marriage and divorce are two sides of the same coin, therefore one should be just as illegal as the other. And who is ANYONE to tell ANYONE who they can or cannot marry?

  23. Anonymous says:

    In the cayman Islands the majority of marriages are between Caymanians and expatriates.  In most of these marriages, the Caymanian partner either has a good job, business or money in the bank.  Most instances these marriages are not consumed with love from the foreign partner, it is more a "Game of Chance"  Whereby the foreign partner may have the opportunity to work send their money home, and has no intention of consumating a marriage life with their Caymanian partnet. (check the divorce complaints at the courts and immigration).  In Cayman the population of Caymanians are very small so that causes them to be exploited by foreign opportunist looking a cheap ride.  You will hardly see foreign nationals marry foreign nationals on this Island unless both of them have equal shares of wealth and has a plan.  A Caymanian woman married a foreign man two years ago, only to find that he was slowly poisoning her with arsnic in small doses.  Which would eventually kill her after a few years.  When doctors discovered the arsnic in her blood and she threatened to call the police,  he then began to give her something called Bissy to conteract the poison.  She already has some damages done to the body.   She has finally divorced him, and this evidence was presented in divorce court.   The question is will the Immigratioin still allow him to remain and work on the Island.  He is still working under her name, and has been going to her home pressuring her for 10,000. dollars and asking for the marriage gifts and tormenting her..  Many other hair rasing cases have been told about marriage of convenience, but the immigration continue to allow theforeign counterpart to continue on working under 3 month renewal temporary work permit.  Why so?  because the Foreign counterpart does not want to obtain a one year permit for reasons of having to do a medical and have insurance and pension.  There is too much corruption going on in this place because of these marriages and there is absolutely no use of copmplaining to the immigration department. Lets see how long they will allow this man to remain on Island. Maybe when we hear again she is missing.

    • Lady Ga Ga says:

      Hey,

      I’ve handled staff hiring Caymanians and X-pat. I can tell you that THE REASON that man is working on a 3 month renewal work permit is because READ MY LIPS:

       HE HAS A CRIMINAL RECORD IN HIS COUNTRY OF ORIGIN!And does not qualify for a one year work permit. Why else would one married to a Caymanian national need to work on a temporary work permit.SOMETHING IS SERIOUSLY WRONG WITH HIS POLICE RECORD HE’S A CRIMINAL already before he came here! So PUT A STOP TO THESE MARRIAGES OF CONVENIENCE AND DEPORT THEIR SORRY GOOD FOR NOTHING BLOOD SUCKING MURDING ASSES!These domestic abuse cases are to be pursued by the police whether the victim pursues it or not. Yes change the law to include this police policy to stand up in court. Was this man in the medical field why he knows how to reverse poison?OH I THOUGHT I HEARD IT ALL!

      GUYS,

      MARRY your own CAYMANIANSthese people are ojly using youYour marriage is only temporary and the courts need toTO PUT A STOP TO THESE KINDS OF MARRIAGES AND LEAVE THE "NORMAL CAYMANIANS ALONE!"

      I wonder how much Insurance coverage he had out on her! with he as beneficiary, this woman was really a simpleton to not put this scumbag in prison for attempted murder. Work Permit Board and Immigration Board and the courts give him some jail time and  get him off this island. She by law should be automatically divorced from him under these circumstances. You hear me McKeeva yes its a change to the marriage law that’s needed but not in keeping these kinds of people together.ITS costing us tax dollars.

      KEEP AN EYE ON THESE DAMNED X-PAT/ CAYMAN MARRIAGES.

      And Caymanian young men and women marry your own  people that you know and grew up with, have a lot of children like the Indians and lets take our country back the grassroots way. Yes its a blessing to have a lot of children. the x-pats want you to not have any children they have a plan to take over the country’s wealth and make Caymanians extinct so do not buy into that lie. Stop the abortion murdering babies, Multiply Marry and be fruitful have a lot of children they will bless you in life later on, stay in church take them with you and Cayman will be a happy place to live.Stop having children for imported criminals who you do not know their background or their police record. Some of them are murderers.

      • Anonymous says:

        Lady Ga Ga you are so true in every word you say and to comment further. This man is an Ex police officer from Jamaica. He stalked this woman after Ivan who had lost her first husband and living alone. The woman is one of Caymans finest/ best kind, and has a good bank job. A church woman who is timid and very private. This man was living in a rented room across the road from this ladys home. . He stalked her day and night. She said that if she got up to go to the bathroom at night he was standing acroos the road looking at her house. Big big house. When she watered her plants he was there, when she left for work he was there wispering sweet nothings wanting to take care of her because she was alone. After Ivan she was devasted and needed a friend. He took advantage of the situation. Disgustingly, and unknowing to her, he was living with his Jamaican Landlady who has a Caymanian husband living with her. The lady did not know all of this until after she was married, then his landlady sidekick became jealous and told the woman about the affair with she and her husband. Can it get any worse. He got a job gave her 50.00 every two weeks, took her to Jamaica and brought her back sick. Checked doctor to find out she had high amount of arsnic in her blood. When she became sick he brought a paper for her to put his name to her bank account and wanted her to sign his name on all her house and property. I could go on an on with what took place but it would take a week to tell. Immigration need to keep a close eye on these marriages of conveniences, some of the partners are too afraid to speak up, because many of them have been threatened trust me.

        • Anonymous says:

          14:04

          Check this out. A lady with 4 siblings all grown died some years ago of cancer and the eldest daughter was stupidly in a relationship with one of them similarly described by you.  He was in Jamaica waiting around for her mother to die. The girl would called her mothers house every day from work NOT asking how her dying mother was doing,  but WHAT ABOUT HER MOTHERS HOUSEbecause she wanted the house!   People said it was disgusting. then when the mother died, the idiot gal got her share of the house sale out of the will and gave the Jamaican man every red cent. He disappeared and went to Jamaica living LARGE with his woman there!  while this stupid gal was walking up and down like a mad woman with NOTHING!

          CAYMANIAN GIRLS, Marry your own Cayman boys, do not date them, do not marry them, they are here to WORK NOT TO MARRY YOU., They are NOT your own kind. Deal with your own kind. . LEAVE THESE FOREIGNERS ALONE, BLACK AND WHITE  THEY DO NOT MEAN YOU ANY GOOD. They say you are Stupid Caymanians.

          Boy it’s quiet in ya!

        • Anonymous says:

          A good word of the wise – “BE NOT UN-EQUALLY YOKED”. Many of our problems point to education and un-educated where there is no understanding or compromise in a marriage. This seems to be the trend in Cayman. How does one think of marrying a carpenter, mason, Gardner when you are a Banker, lawyer, manager, or carry some other professional accolades – Just cannot work, it is a creation of problems all around and does justify or ualify any marriages.

          Nowadays, one needs to get real and stop jumping into marriages that only last a few months all because there is some venue of gain on their priority list and by doing so they would have justified their case.

          In my opinion many of these persons are “OPPORTUNIST” waiting for family bate and preying from all angles without a heart – they just do not care how you have struggled to achieve your goals.

          How disgusting to hear of the things that have happen and is happening in our society with marriages; Therefore, it should be a reuirement to invesitgate such acts expeditiously taken into hand to relieve pain and suffering that will cause death or affliction to someone

          A suggestion to assist these persons, is to have a “safe place” in each district for abuse partners in marriages.

      • Combat says:

        That man could not only have a criminal record but also HIV/AIDS why he’s married and shunning the permanent work permit process!

        Weird and should be investigated.

        • Anonymous says:

          This is some good advice for the Chief Immigration/ Department. Request Police record and medical for 3 month work permit. Do you really know how much damage can be and has been done in three months? FYI do you know that there are certain private doctors on the Island, have done blood test for work permit applicants, they have came back with drugs and so an so in the test. The persons opened the letter and went back to the doctors and got a clean one. Stop allowing private doctors to do these test…They should be done by government hospital doctors and nurses. Is there a reason why these applicants are not asked to have this test done by government hospital? Corruption again. Or if they are done by private, why cant the results be emailed to the secretary of immigration Work permits board. Corruption, corruption Deny it..

      • Judean People's Front says:

        This is why the foil hat should be worn indoors as well as outdoors!

    • Anonymous says:

      That’s funny.  Whilst I am strongly against the many ‘convenience’ marriages I witness here, one strong pattern I have observed amongst both my Cayman and expat friends who have married:  The majority of the expats are working and supporting their Caymanian partners, who seem to think they are entitled to the spoils of their partner’s hard work without making too much, if any, contribution or commitment to the couple’s finances or marriage vows.  Most of these marriages in this situation are not consumed by the Caymanian partner who seems to treat their partner as ‘cash cows’, belittle them, and show them more hate than love and respect.  

      On the other hand, there’s the ex pats who clearly marry merely to get an easy residency, since the introduction of the recent Immigration Laws and rollover requirement.  The number of ex pats I know who have irretrievably broken marriages to Caymanians do not divorce because they fear they would be sent home.  

      Both situations are ridiculous, and for me, totally abuses the sanctity of marriage.  People should not marry for residency, money or materials things, they should only marry through love and devotion to each other.  That is what marriage is about and marriage is a very serious business with contractual obligations that should never be taken for granted.

  24. mmmm.... says:

    The divorce laws should be amended because two years is a long time to wait. It should be like 3-6 months! and the whole alimony should be scrapped too…why persons rights both man and woman become equal yet our law still reflects traditions of a time long gone…

    • Lady Ga Ga says:

      Two years! is this the DARK AGES!

      If children are involved 9 months  to a year is reasonable.

      No children just 2 crazy adults who hate each other and should’ve never been caught together let alone get married – DIVORCE THOSE TWO ASAP in

      6 weeks!.

      Good logic: get out of it QUICKLY before little ones are born into the misery!

      Alimony if married a few years,come on now its only fair.

      For the smart ones. there’s always the PRENUMPTIAL AGREEMENT option!

      • Judean People's Front says:

        ‘For the smart ones. there’s always the PRENUMPTIAL AGREEMENT option!’

        This only applies if you are a Numpty.

      • Anonymous says:

        There should be NO ALIMONY for MARRIAGES OF CONVENIENCEz in a divorce court.

        Send them HOME!

  25. Anonymous says:

    We are not a committed kind of people as one new nation come with better looking women the mane forget about their committment – whats funny is the world is round as they leave thier good homes for the greener grass the greener grass sendign the money for the men in their natiosn that they love.

    its about awareness and love for who you are –

     

    • Anonymous says:

      What is so wrong in a Cicil Servant marriage is that when a poor partner puts up with a long marriage and the Spouse dies the other only gets half a pension. When they are alive it is seldom ever shared. I say if two adults dont want to be married any longer it is none of the LEGISLATORS BUSINESS, JUST LET THEM GET A DIVORCE.  Also if one partner deceases the other should be allowed to remarry and still get their spouses pension.

  26. Anonymous says:

    Bebe Fadas don’t get married cuase it ain’t cool ya’ll….Sheeez I’m a a playa Dawg don’t you know.

    Marriage is a contract in case you didn’t know. If your word isn’t worth the ink to sign then don’t sign.

    Parents, your kids live what they learn.

     

  27. Subway Cookie says:

    I don’t agree that a spouse should have to pay damages for adultery. I do think that the irretrievable breakdown reasoning should be adopted and the fault based approach scrapped. I think the intense counseling etc should happen before marriage. Marriage has lost its shiny wonderfulness, Ive never been married and am not in any particular rush to. Why? Primarily because my married friends complain about the same things I do, and secondly because it seems that the only thing married people can do that single people cant…is get divorced.

    I know that’s a sad representation of how far away from traditional values our society has moved, but personally I prefer to know that if he cheats or beats I can move on without having to drag it through court. I’m not saying those things happen in every marriage, but they certainly seem to be prevailing themes in pretty much all the marriages I see.

    Perhaps this reform will be of interest to others, but I would prefer to discuss preservation, disability or minimum wage reform any day. *yawn*

    • Anonymous says:

      For some years now marriages has not been working in Cayman. The reason being ever since we have allowed every puss and cat to come to our shores the poor Cayman woman cant keep nor get a husband. All the men talk about is going out to get some straight hair gal to fling their hair around their neck It has become a style here now. The saying goes that marriages were ordained in heaven and broken in Cayman.

      • 2 much happy hrs says:

        Well said! I’m living proof of this. Guess my hair wasn’t straight enough or I was buying the wrong cat food. Maybe I’ll try working in the bars next time.

      • Juicy Lucy. says:

        To 02/25/11 -20.45

        Lets blame it on the ex pat,instead of the Caymanian men who cant keep there pee pee in there pants,and cant tell the truth to save there lives.