Lewd acts in public

| 12/06/2014

I have noted that the response by the general public seem to range from outrage to nonchalance with regards to the lewd acts performed by two of our young people in a nightclub. Neither responses are helpful in charting the course going forward. It is important to bring some analysis to the situation; firstly these two young ladies ought to accept the responsibility for their erroneous actions.

Erroneous only because they have taken an act (sexual act) that is usually reserved for privacy into the public sphere. However, they are not the only persons guilty, as not only did others watched satisfying their voyeuristic curiousity, it also appeared that no efforts were made to disrupt these ladies. Guilty also, are those who chose to publish the pictures bringing them into the public domain. My only contention can only be that this was meant to be malicious or a continued lack of judgment on all those who were involved.

As a person who has worked with youth for several years I have noticed a number of social disabilities trending among some of our youth;

  • An inability to distinguish appropriate from inappropriate behaviours
  • Disengagement from consequences of behaviour
  • Unwillingness to take personal responsibility for their actions
  • Lack of empathy
  • Inability to problem solve

These are traits that I have noticed not only in those that we often describe as “at risk”, but also sometimes among those we believe are “well adjusted”. In my mind these are critical behaviours that needs continuous attention and support so that our youth can make better decisions. A quick content analysis of some of theresponses on CNS also reveals that some sections of the adult population as well seem to be devoid of emotions and compassion, hence some of their callous responses.

So where do we go from here? Firstly, I hope that these young ladies and their family access therapeutic support and are able to get through this incredibly tough time. It is also my wish that young people and their leaders start to engage each other in healthy discussions about decision making especially about what is acceptable versus what is not.

Additionally, there is no denying that policies can be examined to facilitate the protection of youth when they fail to protect themselves. A hand off approach will get us nowhere, I encourage the community to gather not in outrage or a blame game, but to honestly garner support from each other and devise powerfully strategies that could reduce some of these “social disabilities” among our youth discussed above.

Print Friendly, PDF & Email

Category: Viewpoint

Comments (43)

Trackback URL | Comments RSS Feed

  1. Anonymous says:

    Can we stop beating this dead horse now!…..moving on!!

  2. Anonymous says:

    I am not sure that there are many people who are qualified to make public comment on this in Cayman. Most have very bigoted views-the same men who would scorn such a thing publicly would be the first to watch and encourage the girls in private, if no-one was watching them. A lot of the ladies just need something to gossip over rather than the price of bread. The politicians-need I say any more? Churches-any body that sticks its nose in elections and tells their flock how to vote is abusing their power and should not be a House of God.

    Whether it is right or wrong, I don't know.I suspect only a judge could say whether it breached any decency laws..and that is probably the only way we will know…unless that law is screwed up here too. What I do know is, that a large portion of youth today see nothing wrong in it, and that is in the western world, not just Cayman

  3. Anonymous says:

    The photos were already viral by the time I saw them on Sandra's page. Everyone seems to have missed her message that went along with the photos tho – how about that?! More like you guys are bulling her. Good thing she has the backbone she does and can ignore you all.

     

    • Michel says:

      I can appreciate your opinion and maybe Sandra’s intentions where good however this should have never been published on Facebook even though circulalating already. We are taking about 2 young Ladies who made a huge error of judgement on their part. We are thought to condemn the sin but pray to save the sinner. It is not a matter of Sandra’s backbone or her being able to ignore those who though what she did was wrong. It’s between her and her God. Who are we to Judge even her. But the fact remains that she did more bad then good. She is very fortunate never to have made mistakes when she was growing up but I know that I am certain these 2 young Ladies are feeling it. Did you really help Sandra in doing what you did ? I do hope you regret your actions and nothing wrong with that. But according to Anonymous 22:22 her response to this situation ,I find it as a like it or not. Careful for Karma is alive and well. For those 2 young ladies my advise to you is to be humble and I pray that a lesson was learned from your lack of Jugment or from peer pressure for God forgives anyone who come to Him. That same advice goes for Sandra ! Love one Another we are thought and have compassion. We have raised 5 children and it was not always easy once they reached a certain age. We must pray for them and never give up on them. Our 5 children now have children of their own and understand today why we did not agree on their actions but we never stop praying for them or Loving them. God Bless and let’s your concience be your guide.

  4. Anonymous says:

    I hope this is a lesson not just for the two young women involved but also for this entire generation which still doesn't seem to understand that social media is not just beneficial but can alsodestroy someones life in a minute. Be mindful of what you are doing because we are now living in an era where cameras are EVERYWHER!

  5. Anonymous says:

    Batabano is the event that has no cultural roots in the Cayman Islands and has been adopted by a vocal local dressmaker and others for the revenue.

    It is part of the problem of cultural identity within the country when foreign events take on a make believe Caymanian tradition.

    Another is Cayman Thanksgiving.

    • Cayman Joke-giving says:

      I couldn’t agree with you more on the Cayman Thanksgiving. Copying is an extreme form of flattery and it’s an absolute joke that Cayman is trying (and apparently succeeding) in making this mainstream. The organizers even went as far as having it around the same time as USA Thanksgiving.

      Joke Joke Joke. As a local, I and the quiet majority will never endorse it.

      • Anonymous says:

        They have it at the end of hurricane season. That is the point of it. Those of us who experienced Ivan know we have a lot to be thankful for any year there is no hurricane.

        Unlike Batabano that is a positive development which we should encourage not disparage. 

        • Anonymous says:

          The concept was OK, but the nomenclature and marketing is derivative and succumbed to American cultural hegemony.

          • Anonymous says:

            Goodness the thought process in some of these responses ia amazing.

            Cayman Thanksgiving is about hurricane avoidance now talk about rationalization. And I loved, "marketing is derivative and succumbed to American cultural hegemony" of course it is American cultural hegemony that made Cayman Thanksgiving into a farce.

            Denial is another problem and not taking honest responsiblity when trying to milk more American tourist money into the country with another American holiday transplanted into the country.

            And you have the nerve to blame foreigners for the confusion within the Cayman cultural identity.

            My only question is, "Do you really believe the words that you type into this blog?"

        • Anonymous says:

          I guess it will not be held during years when there is a hurricane then.

          • Anonymous says:

            If we are still alive we have got a lot to be thankful for. What we don't need is the constant negativity even about things which are positive.

  6. Anonymous says:

    What is a not unusual event, ended up going viral, to the harm of the girls involved, for the sake of advancing the self-publicity of an "activist".

  7. Right ya so says:

    Time to move on folks! Unfortunately these girls made the ill advised decision to do this in public and are now bearing the brunt of the criticsm – what about the others that were there and flooded social media with these photos? Shame on them. 

    Don't tell me this is the 1st time you have seen or heard of such behaviour!

    Leave the girls alone. Let them get on with their lives.Enough has been said. Hopefully they have learnt very valuable lessons here – certain things should be done in the privacy of your home and be very careful who you trust.

  8. Anonymous says:

    storm in a tea cup…….. it was a private party…what has it got to do with anyone else?

  9. Rick says:

    Mr. Hylton,

    Have you considered the possibility that some of us have chosen to ignore the issue to avoid giving notoriety to these kids? I for one have no idea what the videos are like, because it harbours no attraction to me, and I am not a practicing Christian or prude, just cannot see the big deal in a society which finds it quite entertaining to see 5 and 6 year olds 'wining' themselves up at Pirate's Week and Batabano every year. Have you been to these events? Then next time, notice the young kids (I mean 4, 5, 6, etc. years old). Teens are old compared to them. 

    There is another possibility that you seems to have missed. These teens are not necessarily suffering from 'An inability to distinguish appropriate from inappropriate behaviours.' Appropriate to whom? They may simply have different standards for appropriateness than some of us seem to assume. Your standard, does not have to be mine. What is appropriate today might not be tomorrow either.If a crime  or breach of the law was committed due to age or conduct, this will take its course, I hope, and the matter will be academic, my dear Mr. Hylton.

    There seems to be no need for outrage here, but if some want to be outraged, go ahead and shout. Some of us have better things to do.

    Rick

     

  10. MEM says:

    Hopefully this whole thing will have a happy ending like Kim Kardashian's did 🙂

  11. Anonymous says:

    As we all know, youth = errors in judgment.

    1. the girls are already paying the consequences of their "good time"

    2. Ms. Catron should have known way better than to post photos that did not feature her in any social media.     Hello??!!! they were not hers to share!   But common sense is not common, people, and this Ms. Catron character just seems to enjoy wrecking havoc on others in the process of attracting negative attention to herself.

    To the subjects of the photos: learn your lesson – drink less so you remember your boundaries more.   This will pass but it is likely to get worse before it gets better.   A part of the community does not shame you but rather commiserates you.

  12. Anonymous says:

    It was in poor taste for Sandra to repost the pics but all of you are basically "shooting the messenger" here. The pictures were reposted by a lot of people but yet we single out Sandra and accuse her of "bullying". Ridiculous. These 2 girls are responsible for their own actions and should reap what they sowed. If you don't want these types of pictures out there, don't put yourself in this situation. We've all done stupid stuff when we were young and drunk but you accept your shame and blame and move on. As far as one of the girls being on "suicide watch", this is her own fault for letting this happen and the blame DOES NOT fall on Sandra. 

     

    The problem with the youth today is we raised them to dress and dance sexy at a young age, we parade them in the streets when they're barely dressed and then we're surprised when things like this happen. Then we see the results, we find someone else to blame except these same youth. 

  13. MEM says:

    Well celebrities doing dang close to the same thing in front of an audience of millions, anyone blame the young people for getting so rowdy? I haven't seen the pics, can someone confirm if they were worst than Miley Cyrus'???

  14. Anonymous says:

    We are designed to respond positively to watching and being watched when it comes to sex.  Done properly it is tremendous fun.  What you are calling public, most would call private.

  15. Anonymous says:

    If Sandra thinks she did nothing wrong by posting the pictures on FB why did she remove them so quickly?

    • Drop foot says:

      Community activist or troublemaker? Working for good or just bitter? You be the judge.

      • Anonymous says:

        I think Sandra genuinely means well and hasthe community's interest at heart. But like all of us, sometimes she gets things wrong. It was wrong of her to post these pictures on FB even if she took them off.

      • Anonymous says:

        Bitter troublemaker?

      • Anonymous says:

        Trouble maker looking attention if you ask me!! 

  16. Anonymous says:

    Let He (or She) who is without Sin, Cast the first stone…

    Correction begins with compassionate Love intended to heal a hurting soul.

    These were children – don't view them as sexual creatures.

    Are you willing to have their blood on your hands should they find no compassion from you, no sheltering arms to comfort them… and thus destroy themselves in shame and condemnation?

    Are you (a) God?

     

  17. noname says:

    Anonymous 9:43,

    I identified the incident as erroneous, you called "ill advised", I admonished the audience, those who posted the pictures and others who engaged in vitriol. It appears we are on the same page. I further used the incident as a point of departure to discuss a broader issue, about behavioural and social disabilities exhibitied by some of our youth. I then advocated for the community to better support our youth and encouraged the ladies and their family to seek therapeutic help. I am curious as to how I'm engaging in "slut shaming".

    One of the reasons I posted my opinion in Viewpoints as opposed to the general comments, was the hope that people would focus on the broader issues at hand. Those social and behavioural issues that i identified, then engage in frutiful discussion about how wetruly nation build with our youth in mind.  My views could have been applied to countless number of incidents of which our youth are a subject.

    • Anonymous says:

      Thanks for the response Hylton – I don’t doubt that you had good intentions when you posted your viewpoint.

      The issues I have with your piece are:

      1. The grossly inflammatory title (not quite as bad as CNS own story) but pretty out there.

      2. Your piece clearly attempts to draw parallels between what these women did and what you describe as “social disabilities” among our youth. If this was not the case then why would you have included that discussion under the same title as “Lewd acts in public”?

      3. The assumption you seem to make that women behaving in what may be considered a provocative manner is something that indicates a need for "therapeutic help" with regards to what is “acceptable” “decision making” – i.e. that these women should feel shame for expressing their sexuality and get therapy to correct their behavior? (I don’t think there are enough therapists in world to work on every woman who did exactly the same thing up and down West Bay Road a few weeks ago) Would you suggest the same if it was young men in the same situation?

      4. Your assertion that a response of nonchalance by the public is not helpful. I completely disagree – I think it is the only helpful response. Despite your good hearted attempt to open a wider discussion of youth issues supposedly un-related to the women in question – this is not the forum to do it. There are real people at the other end of those photographs. It is so important that they know that although they did something pretty embarrassing – that they didn’t do anything “bad” and don’t deserve the punishment they are receiving.

       

      5. In this instance the only real story here is not around any youth issue or bad behavior by young people. It is about the horrendous behavior of adults – those who took the pictures, those who spread the pictures (Ms Sandra Catron being one of those already named and shamed) and those who wrote “outraged” comments all over the internet. The discussion should be about the “social disabilities” of the type of community that would persecute its young women like this.

      • Anonymous says:

        The therapeutic recommendation was about addressing the tremendous pressure and scrutiny these ladies came under as a result of the exposed pictures. I also described the behavior only as erroneous due to the context. Therefore, the behaviors occurred due to poor judgement perhaps related to lowered inhibition induced by alcohol. There has been no judgement on the sexuality of these ladies. Believe

      • Anonymous says:

        How is the title "grossly inflammatory"? That appears to be exactly what occurred and why the police are investigating the matter.

        I am not a fan of Sandra but it is ridiculous to say the only bad behaviour here is hers and those who took the photos. This is the problem in Cayman – no one wants to accept the consequences of their own actions and everyone is looking for someone else to blame.   

        It is disgusting that you would you encourage this type of behaviour.

  18. Daytimer says:

    With a "Cultural Celebration" like Batabano and Pirates Week Dance how can we avoid this from happening? This type of behavior by default is now accepted. If you can do it in the street why can't you do it in a night club. Maybe the example of others has help to breed this.

  19. Anonymous says:

    Kids do dumb stuff when they are young… everyone has been there.  And sorry, but with a public parade like Batabano where barely dressed young women and men make a sexual spectable of themselves which is accepted as an 'island tradition', how can you blame them??

    I haven't seen the photos in question and don't want to as a matter of respect.  I don't believe these young ladies intended to have their photos taken and spread like wildfire with special thanks to Sandra Catron, a well known activist, who broadcasted the images to Facebook to publicly shame and some would say, an indirect act to bully.

    Hopefully this will prove as a lesson to everyone, including Sandra.

    • Anonymous says:

      It was a direct form of bullying, nothing indirect about it, I heard one of the girls was on suicide watch now, Sandra should be proud, as an adult and having no excuse of intoxication, she has delibrately done this is gain self publicity and the expense of some teenagers.

      • Anonymous says:

        I am not a fan of Sandra's at all, but I am not sure how this became Sandra's fault!  Didnt this start with 2 girls that thought that what they did was, at the time, a good idea.  Even if it was drinking that caused them to think so well, guess what, thats how you end up with drunk drivers…they too think its a good idea to get behind the wheel, until they kill someone.  Not sure Sandra was the problem, she didnt help, but she is not the problem here.

  20. Anonymous says:

    The more this story goes on I think you will see the nonchalance start to turn to outrage.

    It is OUTRAGEOS that in this day and age that these young women are being held up for ridicule, social exclusion and bullying.  I have heard less outrage about young people committing violent crime than over this story.

    Is it really your personal opinion that what these girls did was "erroneous" and potentially indicates "social disability"? If so then please get a grip on yourself and stop being so hysterical. This incident was at worst ill-advised and embarrassing.

    What is significantly worse than what those girls did is what the wider community have now done to those girls. This includes you Hylton – you are now participating in a form of online bullying commonly referred to as "slut shaming".

    The real story here is no longer about some youngsters, getting a bit frisky at a late night disco. It is about the disgusting behavior of the wider community who made this a news story to begin with.

  21. S. Bush says:

    I agree with you 100% Hylton.

  22. Anonymous says:

    What about the men who directed them, egged them on, photographed and videotaped them, and then spread the photos and video throughout social media? What about them? Do they bear no responsibility in this? 

    • Anonymous says:

      Yes they are called "scum bags" and bottom feeders for sure.

    • Anonymous says:

      Yes those men (if they do exist) do have some culpability. Can you please get any sex videos or photos you have of these men over to Sandra C. so she can publicly shame them too.

      Folks, this all started off as a few teenagers doing something silly, and if people like Sandra had not taken the steps she did, I doubt much would have come of it. 

      As someone who spent a significant amout of my time in the past working in nightclubs, I will say that this is not too uncommon for intoxicated humans.

      While I do agree it is somewhat sensational to see people we know and call friends, family or a part of our community in pictures of this sort, I don't hear anyone running out cancelling their HBO, SHO, Max etc subscriptions, and nightly on those channels and many more available from local companies, much more risque stuff is depicted.

      We decided we wanted to be a free open society, well with those freedoms comes some responsibilty to allowing people some freedoms. I don't agree that what transpired was morally sound or prudent, however unless there are age issues, we all need to take a deep breath and find someone else to bash, that includes you Sandra.

    • Anonymous says:

      What about the Woman that FIRST shared them on facebook whilst bashing them at the same time, and having the nerve to call it "Empowering Women" ?

    • Anonymous says:

      I thought the lighting was a bit poor and they could have been more inventive with the filter.